Master This Skill If You Want To Transform Your Life

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I’ve always had this thing…where I went all in on my diet for a month or two. I would invest a lot of time, effort, and money, trying to convince myself that I’m gonna do it this time.

But ultimately, I would just stop.

It went something like this, I would:

Go all in on another diet and buy all this healthy food
Try a bunch of new recipes…which were way too involved
Start to feel overwhelmed
Fall off the wagon for a few days
Stop the entire process, because If I’m not going to eat clean all of the time, then why bother.

Going through this process of working really hard, then stopping over and over again in my life, really messed up my inner psyche. I put so much effort into the process, then when I failed, it was really hard for me to get started again.

I would say that I was going to try again, but found it really hard to regain motivation and the drive to do it.

The disappointment and frustration that I was feeling was like this dark cloud around my head, making it hard to see the value in trying again.

Even If I could break through that cloud a little bit, I felt overwhelmed with the thought of starting again. The process seemed so insurmountable, that it would keep me stuck in the land of “I can’t,” “I can’t do this!”

So in order to protect myself from potential emotional pain, I avoided taking action towards my goals, which gave me the perfect excuse to eat whatever.

Until I got fed up with myself again that is, then I would start this process all over again.

My problem was that I could never gain enough momentum to keep me moving forward in a consistent direction towards my goals. And I wasn’t consistent enough to build momentum.

I realized that my issues with achieving my goals were not due to lack of knowledge, focus or discipline, but what was really going on was that I had a consistency problem. I knew what I needed to do, but I wasn’t following through consistently. Once I recognized that consistency is crucial when it comes to getting things done, is when everything started to shift for me.

When I look back on what I accomplished in my life, it only happened because I was consistent. Think about your life, your achievements, and how being consistent got you there. There was no other way. Well achieving your health goals, getting to where you want to be, requires the same level of persistence.

The thing that will take you to the next level on your health journey, is embracing this strategy of consistency in your life. Once you embark on any lifestyle change, whatever you decide to do…you will– not – stop.

Your Subconscious Mind

Your subconscious mind is this powerful force that plays a significant role in shaping your actions and behaviors.

And it craves consistency and stability. So when you start something and stop, so like you go all in on something, and then keep falling down; it drains your energy, it drains your body, and it creates this sense of uncertainty and instability in your mind.

And it will hold you down, making it really hard to get back up.

So there is this disconnection. A disconnection between your conscious and subconscious mind. Your subconscious mind, which is deeply rooted in comfort, is not able to align with your conscious desire for more.

This inner conflict produces self doubt and makes you question if you have what it takes to move forward. The subconscious mind wants you to stay right where you are and will come up with every excuse in the book.

It can make you feel tired, that you have too much on your plate already and you don’t have time. It can try to convince you that you can’t do it, that you’re too old, that you’re a hopeless case, then you will start to justify all the reasons why you can’t do it. And these reasons will feel very real and true to you.

Consistency on the other hand, creates a sense of predictability and control. It gives the unconscious mind time to trust and align with the conscious mind, to work together towards a common goal.

Consistency helps you to trust yourself again. That you can be disciplined and have self control to stick to a plan and see it through.

Keep Your Plane In The Air

When you decide on a goal, you’ll want to focus on easy things that you can do over time. So what I mean is focus on consistency vs intensity.

Doing things that require tremendous amounts of effort and hard work, do-not help you to sustain new habits.

Doing hard things leads to overwhelm and you will eventually stop. And every time you start and stop, you are essentially mastering the habit of being, inconsistent.

It is way better to practice a habit with less intensity and do it consistently over time, than doing something that has a lot of intensity and doing it on and then off again, which gets you nowhere.

And a way to think about this, which I learned from one of my coaches, is to keep your plane in the air.

Let me explain. When a plane takes off, It must maintain proper altitude and speed, and respond to any changes in weather or other unforeseen conditions that might affect the flight…so it doesn’t crash.

And it must ascend slowly, allowing the pilot to make gradual adjustments in speed and altitude, which allows for the plane to reach cruising altitude, in a more orderly and stable fashion.

This gradual ascent allows the passengers to acclimate to the changes in cabin pressure.

In this analogy, of keeping your plane in the air, you are the plane, and you are moving in the direction of your goals in a steady fashion and you do not stop. So in other words, you want to get into automatic pilot mode, without landing or crashing your plane.

3 Steps To Mastering Consistency

Getting started is the hardest part.

But just know that every little step that you take will lead you to a place that you have never been before.

A place where you will regain your self confidence and control of your life. Then unwavering motivation will emerge and you will become unstoppable.

The key is mastering the ability to be consistent; which is a skill. And the only way to get better at it, is to practice.

So working with the idea of keeping your plane in the air, I want to go over 3 ways that you can practice consistency.

1) Proceed With Unconditional Commitment

Success is a journey that starts with a decision. The difference between hoping for success and deciding to succeed is the level of commitment that you have to yourself.

If subconsciously you’ve decided not to succeed, your brain becomes guarded against failure, embarrassment, and rejection, and it searches for evidence that supports this belief.

However, if you’ve made an unconditional commitment to succeed, your brain shifts focus, and instead, searches for ways to make it happen.

A lot of my clients and patients are conditionally committed to the process.

They will do something as long as it doesn’t make them feel uncomfortable in any way.

The truth is, if you’re taking action but have not fully decided to succeed, then you are only partially committed. Your commitment is conditional, because you will only do it if it’s easy or simple, or doesn’t get in the way of other things in your life.

If you find yourself in this state, (which is very common), then you are only superficially committed to your goals.

However, when you make a pre-decision to succeed, it means that you will pivot when things don’t go as planned, instead of throwing up your hands and quitting.

Your brain will shift into a high gear, and you become immune to setbacks. You will no longer search for evidence that supports failure, but instead, you search for ways to make it work.

Many people are easily defeated by obstacles and failures, and then it takes a significant amount of time to recover their motivation and drive.

The length of time it takes you to recover after a setback is an indication of how committed you are to your goal. If it takes a long time to bounce back, it’s a sign that you’re not fully committed, and your brain is holding onto negative beliefs that this is probably not going to work.

It is important to commit to your journey and to your goals without conditions. This will help you to push through the tough times and remain focused, even when you feel like giving up.

Think of your unconditional commitment as your pre-flight check. It’s where you decide that no matter what life throws at you, that you will stay on course.

So proceed with unconditional commitment just as a pilot must gradually adjust the plane’s speed and altitude to stay on course, you must also adjust your approach and be willing to put in the effort no matter what the circumstances are, and make small changes as you progress.

Unconditional commitment will give you the focus and the strength that you need to keep your plane in the air and reach your destination.

So in order to unconditionally commit to your goals before you take off again, here is a little pre-flight checklist that I want you to go through.

Pre-decide: The first and most important step is to pre-decide that you will succeed. Make a commitment that you are more committed to achieving your goals than you are to comfort. Make a declaration that you are no longer willing to tolerate living like this and that you are willing to do whatever it takes, no matter how hard or uncomfortable it may be.

Uncover Your Why: Take the time to reflect on what you truly want in life. This can be a difficult process, but it is essential to making an unconditional commitment.

Be Patient and Trust The Process: Those who are on the path to transformation understand that they will not be successful right away. They are committed to the journey, not just the destination. They know that the road to success is a long one, and they are willing to put in the time and effort required to achieve their goals.

Commitment is a powerful motivator when it comes to achieving your goals. By committing to your goal, you create this incredible sense of accountability and trust in yourself, which in turn increases your consistency and helps you stay on track.

2) Focus On Long Term Growth

If you want to make lasting changes to your health and wellness, it’s important to understand that there are no quick fixes.

Fad diets, magic pills, and other short-term solutions may produce temporary results, but they’re unlikely to be sustainable in the long run.

Why? Because you go from 0 to 100 without learning anything about yourself.

If you think about a plane ascending, it must do so slowly so everyone on board can acclimate to the changes in altitude. As you are moving in the direction of your goals, you must be able to acclimate to the changes that you are making along the way.

This is most people fall short, myself included. We don’t want to have to acclimate to change and do the work, we just want to get there quick and easy.

However, if you find the quick fix, the quick weight loss plan, that shoots your plane straight to the cruising altitude, so where you quickly lost 50 lbs, you will crash and burn because you aren’t acclimated to exist at that altitude.

You won’t know how to survive at that altitude, at that level where you have never been before. And so you won’t be able to handle being up there. You won’t know how to keep the weight off because you haven’t learned the lessons, there was no real growth. So you will descend quickly, and start gaining all that weight back.

The only way that you can become acclimated to that altitude, and stay up there, so that everything that you do is sustainable and automatic, is to ascend very slowly.

Because there are so many things that you must learn on the way up. The lessons that you learn on the way up are absolutely required in order for you to be able to stay in the place that you are trying to get to.

This is why quick fixes don’t work, because you are missing out on the valuable lessons and experiences that come with the process of working towards your goals.

The place that you are trying to get to requires introspection and the willingness to face the challenges that come with growth. If it doesn’t challenge you, then you cannot grow.

So keeping your plane in the air means that you never take time off from working on your habits. You have to do something everyday, no matter how small or insignificant you think it is.

So if you don’t have a lot of time or you’re not feeling particularly motivated to eat a healthy meal or go for that walk, if you have an all or nothing mindset and do nothing, that… would be landing your plane.

And every time you land your plane, the place that you are trying to get to, gets further and further away until it feels out of reach.

How long will it take for you to recover and take off again?

It depends on how hard and how many times you have crashed. It can take longer and longer each time and sadly for some women, they are grounded for years.

They have been deeply wounded by repeated failures, so much so, that their subconscious mind is literally holding them hostage.

It’s hard for them to take flight again because their mind remembers how it felt to crash. Which wasn’t a pleasant experience, and the subconscious mind hates the experience of failure.

If you adopt a long term growth strategy, where you see each day as a chance to learn, not just to achieve a result, it takes the pressure off of having to achieve immediate results. By focusing on the journey rather than the destination, you’ll be more likely to stick with your goals, even when progress is slow.

So you’ll want to play the long game and give your full attention and energy to it, and go slow. Doing so will give you the capacity to deal with any roadblocks or obstacles that get in your way. Moving through the obstacles is where growth happens.

Playing the long game may seem like it’s going to take forever to get what you want, however it actually helps you to do more than you ever imagined and you will achieve your goals a lot faster. Because the momentum that you will be creating, is in the direction of growth.

So the best way to focus on long term growth is:

Identify a goal or area of focus related to your health and wellness
Breakdown the goal into small, easy habits
Chose one habit to focus on
Implement that EVERY DAY, until it becomes routine
Repeat the process, building on the mastered habit, by adding a new one
Celebrate your successes and acknowledge your progress along the way.

Focus on gradual improvement and don’t rush ahead until you are sure that your foundation is solid, even if you think you can handle it because this can lead to setbacks.

Advancing slowly can also re-shape the way your brain operates. Each time you stick to your routine, it creates a positive feedback loop that strengthens your belief in your own abilities.

The key is to keep it moving everyday and don’t land your plane.

And you will build a foundation of knowledge and skills as well as trust and belief in yourself, that will enable you to maintain a healthy lifestyle for the rest of your life.

3) Embrace Obstacles

Many people find it difficult to stay consistent because when they bump up against resistance or an obstacle, they see it as a reason to stop. When really, it is a reason to keep going.

They are actually opportunities for growth.

When you embrace a failed attempt at doing something, and decide that no matter what happens, that you will learn and grow from it, you remove the pressure of perfection and instead focus on the process of improvement.

My experience with working with women is that our biggest obstacles are typically around negative self talk, which leads to procrastination, fear, and doubt. And what you need to know is that when they show up, they are actually invitations for you to reflect on something about yourself, something that you need to learn.

But if you try to jump over the obstacle without learning anything, you will just go right back to what is familiar and comfortable in your life.

This process can be a little scary, but once you can understand what’s really going on with YOU, then you can do something about it.

So look at your obstacles as a gift. They are not happening to you, they are happening for you.

It is important to understand that there is no path that doesn’t have obstacles. And overcoming these obstacles is the only way to keep your plane in the air.

Keeping your plane in the air is where you grow.

The longer you work to keep your plane in the air, the more resilient you become.

Once you get this…once you learn the lessons of the climb, if for some reason your plane does land, so if something happens in your life and for some reason you have to land your plane, you won’t crash and burn and you won’t stay down for very long.

You will gently land, do what you gotta do, and take flight as quickly as possible.

Here are some ways that you can embrace obstacles as an opportunity to grow, expand, and stay on track:

Ask yourself, What do I need to learn to break through this obstacle?
Pause and become aware of what’s going on for you in that moment
Be willing to deal with negative emotions as they come up
Have the courage to let go of what doesn’t serve you any longer
Explore new possibilities, learn new ways of doing things
Make small adjustments and monitor your progress

The path to achieving your health and becoming the woman you want to be is often met with a lot of resistance, which can make you feel uncomfortable. In fact it’s almost impossible to change and be comfortable at the same time.

But you have to just keep pushing forward even when fear and doubt come up, because this actually means that you are transforming.

Once you move through these obstacles, and get to the other side, you will be amazed by the possibilities that await you and the true extent of your capabilities.

The key is to never give up, as the reward for your hard work is right in front of you.

Let’s Recap On How You Can Master The Skill Of Consistency

With this shift in your strategy, to focus on consistency, taking action will become much easier. The outcomes of your actions will offer you feedback and then you can use that feedback to make the necessary adjustments so that you can achieve and sustain the good health you are looking for.

Here’s a recap of what we went over: